An Ounce of Prevention...

Today, on this frigid February day, I'm sitting in the surgery waiting room for the second time in 2 weeks, waiting on my father as he has another minor operation.  Today it's plastic surgery to deal with a very large hole that is on the bottom of his foot.

This particular "injury" began nearly 2 years ago and is the result of diabetes.  The bones in his feet have softened and had actually broken and come THROUGH the bottom of his foot, but he didn't realize it because he has almost no feeling in his feet and legs, due to nerve damage from the diabetes.

All of this to say that it COULD have been avoided, had he only taken his health seriously nearly 30 years ago when he was first told he was PRE-diabetic.

Where have I heard those words "pre-diabetic" before?  Oh yeah, just this past October, from my nutritionist.

Which brings me to TODAY when I'm struggling with mixed feelings about this WHOLE ordeal, both my father's AND mine!

I don't want to be the patient, lying on the surgery table; scheduling multiple doctor's appointments; remembering to take 23 prescriptions every day; going for dialysis 3x's a week.

I don't want to get to age 66 and not be able to stay awake through a conversation or go out of town to see my grandkids.

And just when I'm ready to give up and say, "Screw this stupid way of eating...give me some chips and chocolate!" I remember this feeling I'm having right now, which is FRUSTRATION!

The myriad of "If only's" come flooding into my mind. 

The questions of "Why didn't he?" play over and over in my mind.

And I don't want to have to look at my husband and sons and say, "You weren't worth it to me." 

Now, my father has NEVER said that to me or my brother, but his actions say it EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

So, my prayer today is that God would bring healing to my father's foot, and that he will not lose it.

And my prayer for myself is to surrender my heart to the Lord again.  Which is a DAILY process. 

Because that "ounce of prevention is WORTH a POUND of cure!"