Old Habits and Major Breakthroughs

Since I last blogged, I can honestly say it's been a TERIBBLE time in my weight loss journey.

I have learned that the old adage is true, "Old habits die hard!"

I am a stress eater...and the last couple of weeks have been filled to the brim with stress.  And hospitals.  And vending machines at that hospital.  And poor choices.

But guess what?!  I survived, relatively unscathed...maybe a little bit messed up from the Coke and the crackers, the stop at the drive-thru on the way home, but overall, I recovered.

And I've learned something about myself.

I am stronger than I think!

Which leads me to the second half of the blog title:  "Major Breakthroughs."

I've been struggling with my weight for just about my whole life; most definitely since I was 15 years old.  And trust me, that was a LONG time ago!

For approximately the last 10 years, I have lost and gained the same 15-20 pounds over and over.  Always I could get down to 240 pounds and I just couldn't go any lower than that.  In fact, it was 1997 when I took Phen-Fen and lost 40 pounds and got down to 200.  Then I got pregnant, gained 46 pounds and never lost it again!  So for many, many years I've been struggling to break through that window of the 240's into anything lower!

It always seemed like there was a wall, a definite barrier that satan himself had set up against me.  Seriously, I know it sounds stupid, but I mean it...the enemy of my soul also was the enemy of my body!  Every time I would come close, it seemed like something would hit me, and I would be stressed and eating and that number would escape me!  Constant sabotage of myself.  It was insane!

A few weeks ago, I was on a mission to reach 239 before I went to see my son graduate from Army Basic Training.  On the morning that we left, I was 240.2.  Yes, I was disappointed.  But I knew I was close.

And then the trip happened, which went great, as far as eating goes.  But there's something about travel that messes with your body.  And I saw the scales go up.

And then a stressful situation within the family, and I found myself off my eating plan and just plowing through the bag of chips.  And I saw the scales go up.

Enter that wonderful "time of the month" and I have an uncontrollable urge for chocolate.  And I saw the scales keep going up.

Needless to say, I was discouraged.  But thank God for Christian people that are walking me through this 8 week program at the doctor's office.  We spent some time in prayer together for us to all get back on track, and that was so helpful for me.

I decided right then and there that I needed to recommit myself, my heart, and my fork to the Lord and go back to the strict 14 day plan.  And it has been super-helpful!

Which brings me to this morning, to when I stepped on the scales and they said, "239.6!"  And I called my husband to come into the bathroom to verify what they said, just in case I wasn't reading them correctly! :)

And I feel like a HUGE victory has been won; a wall torn down; a barrier broken!!!!  Which gives me the confidence to keep pressing on, keep focused.  And reach the NEXT weight "bracket."

220's, HERE I COME!!!!